I'm drinking on the job... HEAVILY
Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
I wish there was a non-hangover washing machine that I could stick myself in right now
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
Randomize