This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
I feel like if your cat could talk she would call me a cunt.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was just at the bank and there was a fat lady wearing a cape. today is gonna be awesome.
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
"Bring the kids" is the most terrifying 3 words I've ever heard in my life.
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
Someone broke into my car last night. Didn't take anything, even left the beer in my backseat. They need to get their priorities straight, obviously.
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
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