Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
An outback commercial just played and I remembered that guy from Australia Imade out with at the Derby. Great Bachelorette Party, btw.
I deserve a fucking award for best roommate. I just cleaned his room, so he can have a 3 some
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
I just realized I slept with a guy who used the pickup line "do you have a bandaid? I skinned my knee when I fell for you."
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
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