I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
I didn't even have time to sit down and the nurse was like: ''You've been having unprotected sex.'' HOW DOES SHE KNOW?!?
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
Had a slight melanoma scare this morning. Spoiler alert, it was Nutella.
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
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