I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
Ah, Christ. I just saw a D lister I made out with once on a Rock Of Love rerun. Why are you asleep right now? Some weird shit is happening.
If you’re wondering why the bong is outside the garage door just know I was being environmentally efficient by not using the freezer to chill my shit
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
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