i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
I just conveyed my whole sex life to my mom over voicemail. Anddd, I'm hammered.
Top night. Top night.
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You kept saying “keke” over and over so I slapped you then you proceeded to ask if I loved you. In case you’re wondering why you have a black eye - Lauren
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
I could be doing way worse things besides texting him 'come over and bang my headache away'. i could be on meth
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
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