Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
where am i from again
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Unlike bears, this weekend is not the #1 threat to America. It is, however, the #1 threat to my liver
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
I'm sobbing to NWA
we had to invent a new word for how drunk I was last night
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
So turns out my new assistant isn't really my assistant. The owner needed a title for his FWB so his wife wouldn't catch on. I got a three hundred a month credit limit boost on my corporate credit card instead.
Randomize