Texts From Last Night

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  (443): View more from Maryland

  I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?

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  (443): I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute? http://tfl.nu/jztq
  Replies (5) Good night (856) Bad night (3367)
• Favorite

  (559): View more from California

  So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best

  (310): View more from California

  and??

  (559): View more from California

  Cake is only good when you eat it

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  (559): So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best (310): and?? (559): Cake is only good when you eat it http://tfl.nu/ifoq
  Replies (19) Good night (917) Bad night (4317)
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  (205): View more from Alabama

  just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.

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  (205): just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed. http://tfl.nu/2764
  Replies (47) Good night (6377) Bad night (2104)
• Favorite

  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water

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  (508): He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water http://tfl.nu/2dzm
  Replies (11) Good night (2423) Bad night (3199)
• Favorite

  (903): View more from Texas

  I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.

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  (903): I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again. http://tfl.nu/pun6
  Replies (39) Good night (4384) Bad night (942)
• Favorite

  (612): View more from Minnesota

  And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.

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  (612): And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer. http://tfl.nu/cz4h
  Replies (8) Good night (4452) Bad night (2018)
• Favorite

  (850): View more from Florida

  We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.

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  (850): We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself. http://tfl.nu/yba7
  Replies (3) Good night (2559) Bad night (736)
• Favorite

  (703): View more from Virginia

  Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?

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  (703): Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again? http://tfl.nu/bgom
  Replies (8) Good night (1015) Bad night (3466)
• Favorite

  (910): View more from North Carolina

  there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....

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  (910): there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time.... http://tfl.nu/4vkt
  Replies (7) Good night (2992) Bad night (1230)
• Favorite

  (716): View more from New York

  i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls

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  (716): i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls http://tfl.nu/crru
  Replies (8) Good night (2258) Bad night (1168)
• Favorite

  (516): View more from New York

  I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card

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  (516): I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card http://tfl.nu/zhem
  Replies (7) Good night (2706) Bad night (1203)
• Favorite

  (785): View more from Kansas

  if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.

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  (785): if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start. http://tfl.nu/i0wv
  Replies (16) Good night (753) Bad night (1266)
• Favorite

  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.

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  (610): And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting. http://tfl.nu/51mm
  Replies (10) Good night (651) Bad night (1502)
• Favorite

  (919): View more from North Carolina

  Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom

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  (919): Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom http://tfl.nu/af7u
  Replies (5) Good night (1586) Bad night (392)
• Favorite

  (716): View more from New York

  I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew

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  (716): I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew http://tfl.nu/lady
  Replies (4) Good night (1042) Bad night (287)

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