How'd it feel making her break her religion?
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
You tried to prove you weren't drunk by loudly singing the romanian national anthem. Why the fuck do you even KNOW the romanian national anthem?
Riddle me this: why did I wake up next to a stuffed sword fish?
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