four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
Hey can you text me Heidi's phone number. I just stapled her mattress to the wall and I want to send her a picture of it.
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
I don't know if I'm more disturbed by the fact that you hooked up with a dude with one arm, or that "hook up with a dude with one arm" was on your bucket list.
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
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