dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
I need a good reason NOT to eat this entire jar of nutella right now
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
Randomize
