If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
I made my uber driver take a pit stop between clubs so we could restock on Xanax. #priorities
Well I'm half drunk in a green tutu at a chipotle. So pretty good parade.
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
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