having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
Randomize
