guess who was drunk and crawling in the middle of the road and got brought home by the police last night? HINT: ME
Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
Woke up in a fanny pack with a bag of cocaine on my cheek
i don't know what it is about you being around kids that makes me want to screw your brains out
That is the creepiest and also the sexist thing you've ever said
i think it's like a sexual celebration of not having kids
She told me I’m a “stunt cock.” I’m okay with that
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
Randomize
