office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
I can get there in 20, one question, Drress Code? Stripper Lite (make up may require an additional 5-10 minutes), Suggestive Professor (professor Kamil's cleavage ain't got nothing on me), Daywear, Dyke (and trust me you ain't seen dyke), or Exactly What I'm Wearing Right Now. (all of the above may arrive under a coat and are subject to my level of sobriety. Which is currently like nonexistent).--xoxo you know you love me, Gossip Girl.
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
Randomize
