wakey wakey hands off snakey
Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
you got in a fight with your imaginary friend last night when he didn't catch you after a surprise trust fall
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
Randomize
