dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He did plead exhaustion. And I made him push through it. I am like the motherfucking badass football coach of sex.
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
Dude, I need a fuckin wingman and this could finally make us eskimo brothers, how can you pass that up?
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
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