two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
Apparently I masturbate in my sleep now.
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
I think the duck is in my room. You have no idea how much worse a duck makes a hangover
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
Randomize
