i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
Try explaining "the nature of your relationship" to a cop when your fuck buddy vandalized your car. Priceless.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
Went online to check my credit card... $147.87 at Waffle House. $632.36 at "Red Rose Gentleman's Club" and a $1000 cash advance from an ATM. I may no longer be a fiancé.
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