at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
i totally just wrapped her wedding gift in tin foil. These are the skills 2 bachelor's degrees have given me.
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
Randomize
