Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
i forgot how awkward it is to meet new people sober
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
I'm sorry about your car but on a brighter note I did wake up in my dorm. That's something right?
Fuck you.
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
I just slipped on ice and peed on my pea coat. There's a pun there but I'm too sad to make it
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
Randomize
