You're completely useless in the revolution.
How many nights a week you wake up with sticky boxers cause you were dreaming of Clay Aiken? Your wife mad?
there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
Your boyfriends underwear are hanging from my kitchen window. Where the fuck are you?!
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
