we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
Blood and glitter go together right?
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
I'm going to write a horror movie. It's going to be called "Fat People on a Squeaky Bed" and it's going to feature me laying in bed last night listening to my overweight roommate and her fat boyfriend tossing and turning all night
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
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