you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
did i just pee glitter
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
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