Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
I was fine until "Under Pressure" came on the radio. It's like God wanted me to shit my pants on the drive home.
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
don't worry dude i have your phone, text me when youre gonna come get it
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
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