Sometimes when I see pregnant women, I wonder what position they were in when they got knocked up. Then I gag a little.
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
Can we be in one of those super weird relationships where you carry me around everywhere?
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
I thought I was drunk because I kept grabbing his arm instead of his dick
But then I realized it wasn’t his arm and that I was very lucky
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