we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
Apparently I gave him a 'Steve jobs blowjob'
im calling her cock vulture from now on
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
Turns out your granddad is cooler than you. We're taking him on our New year's eve pub crawl instead. Sorry.
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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