Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
Either I need to stop bringing you back to my apt or I need to stop buying ikea furniture
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit."
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
Randomize
