My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
I can’t shake the image of her gigantic black unibrow. It’s like I got a blowie from Eugene Levy
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