I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
PS if you want to hear something hilarious as my little sister was showing me her engagement ring I open a Snapchat from R and it's literally a dick pic. Very different points in our life
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
Randomize