I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
Right now I'm drinking out of a gallon water jug & eating a baconator. If you're feeling down, just remember you could be me.
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
We played wedding bingo. I made out with the maid of honor and fucked one of the bride’s sorority sisters. But I needed to get with the groom’s cousin, a mother-in-law to be, or the wedding planner to win and I came up short.
Randomize
