operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
All his ex-girlfriends are delicate flowers, tho. And I'm like a trash compactor.
I wouldn't worry about it. You know what they say, THICK THIGHS MAKE THE DICK RISE.
Randomize
