Remember that night when i almost got you arrested? Is that funny yet?
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
I just love that it's Veterans Day because I know in my heart that I have serviced some of their brethren in the dirtiest, hottest, most shameful ways possible.
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
Randomize
