SEEEEXXX PLEASE
The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
you wrote "5 million dollars" in the tip line for the pizza delivery man and insisted that he deserves it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
I woke up to him eating cereal out of my viking helmet with a shot glass. No idea where he got the milk.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
Sorry. My phone died in the middle of you explaining why we would never work as a couple. Whatever you were gonna say, I probably agree.
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
I just licked a piece of cheese off my phone screen if that makes you feel any better
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