have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
Look, you don't know disfunction until you've sat on the john taking a shit and crying while totally sober.
I just took a service station dump so foul I had to buy gas out of guilt
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Randomize
