I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
walked into a party last night, i saw 3 ex gfs standing in a circle talking to each other...that's the quickest u-turn i've ever made in my life.
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
Randomize
