Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
i just saw a woman using her birth control packet as a wallet.
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
How many tongue depressors should I need to steal from urgent care to make samurai armor?
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
Benefits of having to stay in jail for the weekend: learned how to make my own make up out of colored pencils. Also how to make use of toothpaste for hair products. Downfall was probably getting hit on by a murderer. Only me.
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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