you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
You were so high you insisted on spoon feeding me your KFC bowl while I was driving.
Was who let the dogs out playing?
Ya. You started barking when it ended
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
Randomize
