Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
I just saw a girl walking home wearing a tshirt, boxers, and cowboy boots. Thanks for having the decency to drive me to my car.
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
Lo siento on account of my penis...
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize
