Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
Bad news. I lost my teeth. Good news. I can still take a guy home sans teeth.
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
I'm concerned I'll look like a hooker on new years eve in this outfit
There are different standards on new years eve. To look like a hooker you literally need to be giving a guy head on the street while he's handing you cash.
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
Apparently, the right response to, "How do you feel about a terrorist being in the area?" isn't, "Well, we have vodka in the freezer, so we're good for now."
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
Randomize
