dude i woke up laying next to some guy. i dont have my bra or his name. he has a nice tv though.
drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
you need to not memorize your credit card number for drunk pizza
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU"
Promise me you will not let me do anything sexual with or to a mini horse no matter how drunk we get. Ever.
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
I have to choose between charging my phone or my vibrator. This is bullshit.
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
Randomize
