people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
I am watching Grease 2 and properly learning how to apply a condom to a banana. This is a sign from God that this is the closest I will ever get to having the need for one.
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
You got in the cab and told the cab driver "we only have seven bucks so you better drive fucking fast".
I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
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