You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
The air was thick with penises
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
Dude, he danced with the dog that some random chick was carrying at the bar. Then the dog jumped out of his arms and ran away. THAT definitely deserves a drink.
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
Randomize
