dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
I let a drunk, gay man in a dragon costume motor-boat me. With his dragon head.
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
Masturbated furiously for a half hour; ate a fistful of chocolate, then took a nap. Woke up and finished wrapping presents. I've got this holiday thing down.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
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