I can't find my pants or my car
I didn't even hookup I think I took them off at taco bell...
ha omg I always lose my dignity at taco bell as well... so no big deal.
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
Last night was just one giant freudian slip.
You made out with EVERYBODY.
Can I just bleach my life?
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
Spending 4 hours in the emergency room today tells me that your birthday party was a success.
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
So you're on like a list there now..."Do not under any circumstances give this person a knife. Serve them in plastic cups ONLY"
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
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