why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
I woke up to him crying and pouring pixy stix in my mouth saying they would bring me back to life.
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
Randomize
