I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
Randomize
