I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
A girl just asked me if we had pregnancy tests and a coworker had to stop me from telling her I was a pregnancy test. THAT is why I don't drink at work.
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
Randomize