your drunk exhusband is tryin to get with my drunk exgirlfriend. i think its funny. if you still talk to him dont say anything.
we're not divorced.
Your mouth is God's brothel.
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She got mad when I told her I'd bone her mom. She got MORE mad when her mom heard, and was flattered by it. Proud to say I attract MILFS.
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
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