he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
We almost forgot to tip the maids, so we left the rest of the gin, some tonic water and a lime. They earned it
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
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