Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
God gave him joint rollers for hands
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
SHE'S PREGNANT AS SHIT, AND I JUSR PEELED A CLEMENTINE TO CHASE SHOTS WITH!! COULD LIFE GET ANY BETTER!?
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
Randomize
